before all else

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not safe in life’s amusement park,

pain takes lodging behind the eyes

I’d await the unrelenting sting

without intention to accept it

twirling on the dance floor

hiding hurt behind the beat

the ache so deep, so genuine

sucking life from inside out

despondent in an asylum of mistakes

craving a common or a temperate stroke

a touch of solidarity, can you please

set aside a cup of tea, grant a private smile

the rise and fall of hurried assessments

overtake nomadic searching of those

sad and slow good-byes

how appropriate and simple was the decline

mistake by sad mistake

judgments pronounced, decisions made

mixing with a sick and rotting pain

of failing, slipping, fading slowly

many years ago he whispered, “take my hand—

love yourself; take back your soul before all else”

and while a bit of wisdom never hurts

I could not embrace the promise of it

Life Interrupts Life

 

 

After having 68 years of practice for dealing with the things that can complicate life, I have learned one thing. You have to face the good and the bad, because it just can’t always be good. Sometimes I go as far as trying to appreciate the bad as well as the good. I am mildly successful with this on some occasions, but right now I’m struggling. There are some things bubbling around in my happy Baja world and I find that I must interrupt this interruption. By that I mean I have to come up with things to do that will give me back my happy.

Last night I had two neighbors over to share a nice lasagna dinner. We spent our time talking and laughing and sharing stories. Today I made cookies

 

Yum! Right out of the oven.

and took some to my friends, Greg went to help a pal with a chore at his house, we took our doggie for a beach walk this morning (like everyday)

 

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and this afternoon we went snorkeling. The beautiful tropical fish live right across the street from me. How delightful. This is the first time I’ve snorkeled here by our house and I can’t wait to do it again. Usually there are too many pounding waves, but today it was so calm. Now I’m going to settle into a hammock chair outside on my upstairs deck and read a book for awhile. I’m reading Wonder Boys by Michael Chabon that a friend loaned me.

 

Peaceful, easy ways like this can shake the troubles away. It means those icky interruptions aren’t going to stop me from living my happy life. Interruptions be gone! Life is sweet when I make it that way.

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Silk Sunflower by Susie

 

 

 

What bugs you?

Don't be a donkey!

Don’t be a donkey!

 

 

It bugs me when people ask me a question and then don’t listen to my answer. You know the scenario, right? Instead of listening, the question-poser stops giving you eye contact, repeats, “uh huh” in a distracted and almost inaudible manner and tone, and either wanders away or on to a new topic. It’s disconcerting to me that someone would feign interest by posing a personal question and then not listen to the response. And, so as there is no misunderstanding, I’m not referring to the question, “How are you?” That’s a whole other issue.

I have always pondered the purpose of someone asking, “How are you?” if this someone doesn’t want an answer. Oh, I know, we ask it so automatically (I am guilty of it occasionally) that we don’t seem to expect an answer to that question, let alone want an answer. We just say, “Hi. How are you?”

When I was much younger,  I tried an experiment a few times. On an occasion of having a cold or flu when asked, “How are you?” I’ve answered, “Not very well.” Many times, before even a moment passes between the question and the answer,  the question-poser  (automatically) responds with, “Good.” or “That’s good.” In some instances even after this awkward exchange, he/she hasn’t acted like it was a weird encounter, thereby giving me the impression that he/she didn’t even engage enough to hear me.

Not to worry, however. I do not sit around and think about this kind of stuff often. In fact I am rather amused by the whole pet-peevy aspect of my being bugged about this in the first place. There are so many other things I could ruminate about. Things that might even be worthwhile. Some things do matter in the long run.

Like KIVA for instance. Now there’s something worth ruminating about. Kiva empowers people all over the world by securing loans from the likes of you and me. Kiva gives anyone with an internet connection the opportunity to make a loan as small as $25 to someone else to start or grow a business, afford school, build a house, switch to clean energy and much more.  It’s the familiar “help people help themselves” philosophy. Check it out at: www.kiva.org

I’ve taken up plenty of your time. But I do want to know: What bugs you?

I promise to listen to your answer.

 

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I’m not really a crab. This is a crab.

 

 

 

Road Trip: Up and Down the Baja

 

On your mark, get set, go! Oh my…The Baja is an incredible part of Mexico. It’s almost an island; and resembles little of mainland Mexico they tell me (I’ve never been). The highway (if you can call it that) is treacherous, scary, spooky, and is nothing like a highway in the States or Canada. Our neighbor refers to it as a suicide run.

Mostly there are two lanes and no shoulder. The Baja gets all its goods by truck or boat, so we meet many of those trucks on the road. We cringe and literally lean our bodies away from the trucks as we pass by each other going opposite directions. They are so close that we’re sure they’ll take our side-view mirrors–or worse. Believe me this drive is not for the feint of heart.

Much of it is beautiful scenery if you are the passenger. The driver’s eyes are glued to the road and its hazards. This trip found me behind the wheel for only one-half hour. Seriously. I lucked out. Greg is my hero, driving all that way up and down.

The reason for the trip was to visit family in San Diego County. It’s always nice to see the ones you love.

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Greg’s Dad & Val (Mom2)

 

We got to be with our son and his wife and my mom too. All so good for our hearts and the reason for taking the long and winding road trip.

 

 

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Hawaiian Hula Girl on the Dash for amusement. Shake it baby! Shake it!

 

 

Here are some essentials for the road trip:

Money for gas: in our case about 400 bucks.

Snacks that are easily eaten while you drive: peanuts, m & m’s, hard boiled eggs, toasted pumpkin seeds, cheese and crackers, peanut butter and apple slices, cookies, lots of water, coffee, and soda!

Dog food and dog treats for Isabela

A sense of humor–a necessity for life in general, right?

Tunes on the iPod

Tunes on Sirius radio

Sunglasses are a must

Comfy clothes for the drive–loose fitting and cool, as it’s hot during the day. Jeans and sweat shirts are for the wee hours and for nighttime.

Maps with all the road distances between places and the military check points marked, also notes regarding gas stations, hotels and places to grab a bite to eat.

Cell phones for when there is cell service and you want to call and make reservations at a hotel or for emergency

Patience for lots of potholes, lousy drivers, cows or horses in the road, and fog outside of Guerrero Negro for miles!

More patience for windy roads up in the mountains and the monotonous stretches of nothing in the low lands

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You have to stop to let the dog run around and do her business. You can do your business too.

 

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These cardon are a lot bigger than the ones where we live.

 

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Junior high geography–This is a mesa.

 

We camped on the beach in between Mulege and Loreto. Beautiful evening.

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Isabela, our dog, loved being close to the water again. She did not like the city life very much.

Everybody out! Gotta move around a bit.

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In the middle of nowhere!

 

All in all a nice trip, but we are so happy to be home.

 

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Home Sweet Home!

Another Afternoon of Art

 

What wakes you up in the morning? El gallo!

My friend Julie’s lesson with the orphans was to draw and paint a rooster. It amazes us how good these kids are at just jumping right in and making art. All the roosters came out differently because each child makes it his/her own.

I am always so encouraged working with these children.

 

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By Anjela, about 9 years old

 

Dori, my friend from Davis, CA, and her daughter, Lilly, came with us this time. Lilly speaks excellent Spanish and loves to do artistic things herself. They were both a big help.

 

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Dori and Lilly

Hogar del Nino

Lots of work going on here after the hurricane.

 

Julie & Eduardo

Julie helping Eduardo

 

 

 

kids at work

These kids know what to do!

 

 

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A little one concentrating on her painting. What a doll.

 

If you’re ever in town, you should stop by and see the place. It’s awesome–filled with love.

(and some really cool rooster paintings!)

When I was a Fish

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When I was a fish

I saw things clearly

like baby crabs and shrimp

living in the blue world

with me and the other fish

 

When I was a fish

I swam all day everyday

around the coral reef

In and out of the eel grass

without a care in the ocean

 

Now I am a dinner

I am disappearing fast

Two bites, three bites, four

It was more fun being a fish

swimming in my blue world

 

Could a Day Start any Better?

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Rise and shine! The sun comes up pretty early, so we get an early start these days. Our pup can hardly stand it till we start moving toward the door. “I have to get my shoes on, Isabela.” That sets her off to the bench in the outdoor shower where we keep her ball and the chuck-it. All her days start like this. We walk across the street onto the trail Greg made for us, and we’re down on the beach in under a minute. Happiness is a dog on the beach with a ball.

 

Today’s happiness, besides throwing the ball for Isabela, was Greg casting his fishing line, me finding beach glass and newly hatched turtles.

 

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That’s right! BABY TURTLES TODAY.

Oh how happy! I yelled to Greg down the beach where he was fishing, and he came a running! Two of our neighbors and a Mexican worker, whose part of a crew building a house down the street, also came to be part of the thrilling spectacle.

 

I’ve mentioned this before, but I get so upset about the tire tracks the turtles get stuck in. This is the time of year when the gringos all show up to live in their second homes. Some ride their 4-wheelers on the beach. It’s not all gringos though. Many Mexicans start bringing their big 4X4 trucks and drive up and down the beach as they fish on the shore.

 

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I never tire of this.

 

There were about thirty babies. They were slow and seemingly exhausted, so we figure they were hatched in the night and tired out from their arduous journey to the water’s edge.

 

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Oh what a beautiful morning!

What a Beautiful Morning on the Beach

Wow! Lots of bait fish in the water this morning. Teeming in fact and close to shore. Some of them were washed up and left to…well…die. They look like infant ballyhoo, but I don’t know for sure if they are.

 

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Baby ballyhoo?

 

 

Our neighbors were having a great time casting and catching this morning. Our dog had a ball too—literally and figuratively. She loves to chase and catch the ball as much as the guys love tossing in their lines and catching fish.

 

 

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Tim with his Rooster Fish

No baby turtles today, but there have been many trucks and 4-Wheelers on the beach. I’m so glad we were able to mark out nests with sticks; at least they won’t drive over them.

 

Another of the 15 or so nests we've marked.

Another of the 15 or so nests we’ve marked.

 

I’m happy and thankful to be alive to enjoy the richness that life has to offer. As you can see, the fishermen were happy and thankful today too.

 

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Hey Aldo, they look like fish–only smaller!

Another fun-filled afternoon at the Hogar del Niño in Todos Santos

 

 

My dear friend, Julie, is an art teacher in Maui and, with her husband, she has a home here in my neighborhood where they spend about half of every year. She reads my blog and it prompted her to express an interest in going to the orphanage with me. That’s how I got lucky enough to be a part of Julie’s water color lesson.

Last Saturday she and I worked on our lesson plan and we created some samples. I learned a lot from her about how to break it down into small steps, which is what good teaching is about. On Monday, armed with courage, water colors, markers, lots of paper, and water color pencils, brushes and some containers for water, we loaded everything in my truck.

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Even I can paint a fish!

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Just painting up some samples!

 

On the way to the orphanage, we picked up another of my friends, Stacee, who hales from Colorado, and with her hubby, she also has a home here. And so it was that we three adults got charged up and went to have some fun. As one might imagine, we enjoyed it every bit as much as the children. Receiving blessings is normally what giving delivers, right?

 

¿Qué vive en el mar? What lives in the sea?

This was the question posed by Julie to the eight, energetic, children artists in our first group. It was exciting to watch their faces light up and see how easily they took to the project.

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They just dig right in!

We were amazed as we watched them dig right in, creating their own special underwater scenes.

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Stacee at the ready!

 

 

We managed to work with about 20 of them before our time was up, and I, for one, was exhausted at the end of two hours. It was a contented exhaustion reminiscent of my years as a teacher.

 

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Angela, Teacher Julie, and Dayana

 

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Rebeca

 

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Alison is a serious painter who loves red.

 

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Jesus proudly displays his art.

 

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His creation is beyond detailed.

 

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Julie and Stacee with the Kids

 

You can’t get too much of a good thing when it comes to days like this. If you are ever in need of a “pick-me-up” you must visit the Hogar del Niño in Todos Santos.

 

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My ear-to-ear grin says it all I think.

 

 The kids are generous with their smiles and their talents—sharing and helping each other is their norm.

 

 

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Angela loves to paint–she did two!

 

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We’re already gearing up for another painting session. Next time we’re going to paint birds!

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Work Day

In sunshine and with light ocean breezes we find lots of work to do around here, but some of it is fun. I made a design around a barrel cactus with the pink rocks I gathered at the beach many months ago. Greg loves to work in the yard–more so than I, but doing it together makes it tolerable and sometimes it’s fun.

We’re all cleaned up and straightened up after the hurricane now. The palapa is finished and the only thing we are waiting for is our friend the painter. He will put lots of marine varnish on it after spraying it with anti-termite stuff. Termites are voracious eaters. Pesky, nasty little varmints who are not welcome in our palapa.

I swept every room in the house and in the process removed a ton of sand. Okay, that’s hyperbole, but it was a lot of sand. And dog hair. And Susie hair. I shook out all the rugs and put everything back and now it looks so nice. Don’t anybody move!

My friend, Julie, is going to go with me to the orphanage soon. She is an art teacher and is going to teach them how to paint animals. In the process, she will be teaching me to paint animals too. We’re gathering our supplies and our courage. Our teacher hearts are going to be very happy playing with those energetic little beings at Hogar del Niño sometime later this week.

I started out a little grumpy this morning, but as the day wore on I got my happy back with my working and playing, planning and dreaming! Hope you have your happy on too!

Now it’s time for a nap. Oh the joys of being old enough to know how delicious a nap can be.

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The Candy Promised

 

Please note: The poet, in this case me, is not the “speaker” in the following poem. I thought it best to give this disclaimer so people wouldn’t worry about my marriage.

 

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I know how to spend my allowance

of daily smiles. Opportunities seen as

calculated chances, I’m traveling a gravel path

to find the candy promised me.

 

 

Marching down your boulevard I see

a burning wild fire of enthusiasm.

A powerful you. A capable me. Pleasing.

A promise given, a promise received.

 

 

The holy presence of our communion shines.

Unafraid, we light our interdependent lamps.

Laughing we will rise, and shield our eyes

from the unexpected brilliance of our kinship.

 

 

Delicious flavors tingle on our tongues;

we savor a notion of cohesion because

it helps us map a richness for our unity.

A vow’s been made—the candy promised us.

 

 

Why is it then that later we do battle?

Casting clever exchanges to be

licked from our lips like ice cream. After all,

we are the pair who clipped our own wings.

 

 

No longer do we wear the hat of empathy

or reside within the photo album of our lives.

It seems contentment only lived on glossy paper,

and fidelity was not the candy promised us.